to no one in particular
As we embark on the edge of January, it’s a little late to discuss New Year’s Resolutions. But if you’re interested, here’s mine:
- Get a job.
- More creative.
- More people–meaning, quality time spent with friends and those who have yet to be my friends.
- Less anxiety.
The one I’ve been focusing on is #2. It’s currently 8:30AM PST and it’s raining outside. I woke up to the sounds of rain, but doubted my instincts (hearing) since I live in one of the driest places in the country. These are my morning thoughts on an empty stomach.
Back to being more creative, though. One could say I’m trying to do so by enrolling in three studio art classes during my final semester of college. But I think it’s more being around people and doing things that will cultivate my creativity. This could mean doing things I’ve never done before, doing things I haven’t done enough of, or, in some form or another, force myself into using my head.
Lately I’ve been trying to read (currently reading “My Life on the Road” by Gloria Steinem). And write. Mostly journal. Which is one of the reasons it’s been such a goddamn long time since I’ve written on this thing. The larger reason is that I haven’t done anything exciting that merits a full blog post (in my opinion).
I keep this blog up-to-date on rare occasions, and I have many friends who also keep a sort of digital record of their lives. Yet while I’ve been writing a personal journal and writing letters to friends, blogging has become foreign to me. There’s a difference between writing something that could potentially be seen by an infinite number of people and writing for a singular pair of eyes, whether that be someone else’s or my own. It’s probably safe to say that my friends who receive my letters might be the ones who know be better than myself. My tone is entirely different, and in some instances there are emotions that I’ll never be comfortable sharing with the Internet. As I write this paragraph I realize that this might be what I want to study in my Internet Studio Art class—a sense of voyeurism, in a way. Sharing our lives to everyone at once and to no one in particular.* There’s a strength in the vulnerability of those who open themselves up to the world, and it’s peculiar to see how it translates into real-life interpersonal relationships. I just need to figure out how to articulate that into art.
8:58AM. These are the photographs that sum up my last fall semester of college. There is nothing special about them, but they provide a glimpse of my life. They originated on a disposable camera, and they range from August-December 2015. These are the people I’ve been doing life with.
*It occurred to me that maybe sometimes we put something out there for someone in particular. Sometimes.
ps. other updates: I’m taking this semester to work on personal projects that also go along with more creativity. perhaps if I remember, I’ll post about them when they come along.